''EASIER SAID THAN DONE'' - The WHEELCHAIR QUARTERBACK

Easier Said Than Done -

(Confessions of a Wheelchair Quarterback)

---Why is this statement...True. We know that it is very, true, for the most part. It is much easier being an armchair quarterback, than to, actually, make the very things you discuss, happen.
---As soon as one begins, the naysaying starts. Even if what you say makes perfect sense and would do much good, an idea doesn't go too far.
---Nowadays, people are already committed, and to get a bunch, let alone the right bunch, on the same page, is very difficult.
---What I wonder is - Why is this the case? Many have already chosen a life-style, and to make changes becomes, ''an old dog, new tricks,'' situation. People are generally addicted to the way they see things - and it usually is so close and ingrained, that they don't even see anything different.
---Their tends to be a lot of emotional attachment to a status quo. This happens to be another Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Despair and then Acceptance - situation. It is a process of letting-go of the old and allowing something new to take its place.
---Why the first step is so difficult, is that we have chosen to make feeding the family a priority and many times to take jobs and/or positions to meet this end as opposed to what we might do if we were free of all this. So, our emotional attachments keep us from acheiving our potential.
---Alas...a New UPDATE/UPGRADED Ending from the 2008 version (above.) - People and things are changing. They are AWAKENING! People are now doing more fulfilling things.  More efficient! Meaning and purpose have taken on a new priority. It has seemed that the bad economy + condition of our planet has caused folks to reinvent themselves in a way that includes doing the right thing in the process. Corruption still exists, but more people are aware of its futility and its costs. It actually seems that some folks get embarrassed at the thought of taking more than NECESSARY. Or, at least they are more aware of their feelings toward it and ARE speaking out AGAINST IT. Learn to Be Well...again!

The CLUBHOUSE MODEL

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---The Clubhouse model is essentially this, (as I see it.) Those on the staff, work alongside of the clients. There is a constant mentoring and teaching going on. The clientele benefit in many ways, by this process. And...so do the staff.
----The Clubhouse is broken into different departments, (working units.) We had units of Clerical, Transitional Employment, Greeters in charge of telephone and buzzing people in, Socialization, Computers, etc. The client and staff person would work side-by-side...with benefits to both sides.

---We need something of the same at LHH, in my etimation. We need more staff/resident interaction. I, firmly, believe that both sides would benefit.
---I think this should be a pilot program, to see where it all goes. As it stands, now, there are many, many decisions made affecting the resident that does include the presence of a resident. Some of the residents are very astute...but have very little interaction with anyone involved with decisions made.
---If 20 hours are spent in meetings per week, about us I am proposing that one half hour per week, is spent, interacting and getting to know us as individuals. There is much done FOR us, but NOT much done WITH us. It is more of a me vs. them place, and not an us space. I believe that this is an We Are ALL In This, Together, World...and we have no more room for a me vs. them attitude. This is not true in all cases all the time, but the me vs. them mindset seems to pervade too often.
---If the Hospital, were more a, ''We Are ALL In This, Together,'' place...I think it would be MORE therapeutic. There then would be a pervasive mindset, that was more true...then a me vs. them, mindset. I think that the idea of Resident-Centered Care, would be more accurate, too.
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---If a new Clubhouse is to be constructed...the staff would not only know their people, but they would work on the design together, wherever possible.
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(written in Nov., 2008)

HOMELESSNESS vs. HOUSELESSNESS

 

CONSIDER THIS...

HOMELESSNESS VS. HOUSELESSNESS

 ---About 4 or 5 years ago, I wrote an Article for ''Voices At Bay'' (a Michael Wise Publication.) It was called Homelessness vs. Houselessness. The point I was trying to make was that people seem to use the terms as being the same, while the two are very different. In our City, in particular, the term Homeless really speaks about those who are Houseless.
---Houseless means that we don't have a dwelling, a place to put our things, a place to sleep, hang our hat, get our mail, etc. Homeless can be a very different situation or ''condition.''. It can be a person who is not at Home, whether he has a House or not. There is a warm feel to the place we call our ''Home.''
---I am sure we have ALL experienced people who seem at Home, no matter where they are. They are generally comfortable with themselves and comfortable to be around. They are at ''Home'' with themselves.
---It comes down to ones acceptance of his circumstances and the situations he finds himself and, when we go a bit deeper, we can see that is the acceptance of ones ownself, or self-acceptance. After all, ''Home is where the Heart is.''        

---I made the analogy that some people can be at ''Home'' in a ''Cardboard Box'', while there can exist a feeling of Homelessness living in a ''Mansion.'' Feeling at Home where you are at, is a very good way to feel. To be at your most comfortable self, no matter what the circumstance, beats having a seemingly nice circumstance, but it doesn't fit who you really are.. You can feel out of place in the best of places. Like being ''alone in a crowd.''

---The hospital has become the House we live in and is Home to some. The same rules apply here as well. By this, I mean, the more accepting we are of our situation, improves the situation. Continually resisting doesn't seem to work. Know what battles to fight and know the ''best'' way to make the changes you see as necessary. Know ''when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.''
---I, myself, spent over a week at UCSF, recently. It was all well and good, but when I was released and was brought up the driveway at LHH, I felt like I was coming ''Home.'' I felt more at peace, and there was a familiarity, even with residents I don't know very well, but see around. I found that somehow this ''House'' [LHH] had become my ''Home.'' I can't tell you when it exactly happened. I gave up the place where I had lived in SF, since 1982, about two years ago. The stroke I had June 2, 2002, changed all that.       
---I am aware that there is a temporariness to the circumstance and situation, as ALL things, in time, have that quality. ''All Things do Pass.'' For now, this is the place I call ''Home'', and it seems like a good place to work on being at ''Home with Yourself.'' See you at the ''Candy'' Store or ''Truckin'' the hallways. Be Well and Happy Holidays.
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(WRITTEN IN 2006)

CHANGE

CHANGE: Going From One Mindset To Another.

 

---We have gone through many changes within the walls of the hospital, where we live. The CNA’s have changed, and we see a change in the Resident Council. What kind of things affect the ways in which we deal with these changes.
---It seems the more flexible and open we are to what is happening, plays a major role. The more narrow and set in our ways, then the more difficult, change is.
---Change is inevitable in ALL circumstances, as this is truly the nature of things. We have ALL made many adjustments to changes in our past, and the future holds many more, I don’t doubt. Some even say that the only thing that is constant, IS change.
 ---Each change brings a lot of newness into  our lives. We seem to learn something, in every change. These are the lessons that life itself is teaching us. Our ability to adapt to change, is a quality we all seem to possess. Each birth is a change, and each death is a change. Change is the way that new things come into being. It seems that we may as well go with it, and learn as we go. Learning to adapt to CHANGE, itself, seems very important. Be Well.

 

 

UNENDING STAIRWAY - NO CHANGE!

CREATIVE SELF-EXPRESSION

Creative Self-Expression

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---Self-Expression itself, is Creative. One only has to look at his ‘’accomplishments,’’ to see the creative quality. It doesn’t go much further than that.
---To utilize the creative ebb within us ALL, we must be honest with ourselves. It is all well and good to say we should be honest, but let’s look at why we are not honest, in the first place.
---We are not usually honest from the outset, because it is usually very difficult and it hurts. I am not saying that honesty is not the best policy, but I‘m saying we are as honest as we can be until it starts to be very difficult. Honesty becomes more difficult, when our self-image is involved.
---Saving face comes into play and our thinking becomes different. We are very protective. There is a conflict between what is really the truth and how we look. Saving face cuts ahead of the line. We find that we tend to exaggerate and tell
tall tales and embellish the truth, so we come out looking pretty good. We don't like to look bad. We do many things to avoid that one. The shoulds and shouldn’ts take second place. We have saving face to contend with.
---Love is the best way, but what does that even mean on the saving face level? Learn to tell the truth to yourself about how you feel. Learn to accept yourself to a greater degree. Learn to appreciate who you are...more. You will find yourself living more creatively. There will be more quality and enjoyment in your life. Be Well.

The Beatles - "Beatles For Sale" (2009 Stereo Remastered) [Full Album]

CATASTROPHIZING

CATASTROPHIZING

---Do you catastrophize everything? Do you think that something is wrong with everything? We know that nothing is usually perfect, (if it seems it is...just wait awhile. It won't be.) So, finding the flaw in every plan and idea, sounds like a good thing. Let's see.
---When we catastrophize...we think in the ''what if's,'' a lot. What if this happens or that happens? We are continually looking for the shoe to drop. Or, the other shoe. We aren't satisfied for too, too long. We are waiting for the flaw to kick in.
---But, this is very important. We don't have to look at what happens as something that interferes with our fun. If we know that what we are doing is the right thing to do, then there is no problem. If no one is hurt in the process, and we see others jump on the bandwagon and all is positive, then we have a winner.
---If we begin trampling on someone else in the process, and they counter our move then we have problems. We may have to re-examine our motive and what we are doing.

TRAMPLING ON ANOTHERS HAPPINESS, TRAMPLES ON OUR OWN!

---It is better for us to involve ourselves with people and places that keep things positive. When we start our ''harmless,'' joking, be sure that the brunt of your harmless joke - is laughing, also, and that your comment won't be misconstrued. It is easy to make someone look bad, so we will ''feel,'' good. This is a short-term fix...at best. If you take care of things on this end, you will see yourself catastrophizing a lot less.

---If we find that we spend a lot of time concerning ourselves with the ''faults + flaws'' of others...we can be sure that we will NOT really trust their behavior and worry about their response and reaction on many things. And, we will definitely find that our HAPPINESS is compromised. Take Care.

COMPETITION: A HEALTHY SIDE

Competition:

A Healthy Side

 

---We are going to look at the healthy side of competition. I must admit that this is ''new'' to me, as I come from the religious side that begins by making all competition wrong. The less one competes and compare oneself to others, he is more spiritual? What is this competition thing?

---I have noticed that building upon anothers ideas, is the way we have progressed and advanced. The technological evolution has taken this course. In our society, as one competes for supply/demand dollars one improves his product that befit the needs and preferences of the consumer.

---On the consumer side, taking it as a whole, we see him using things and refining as he goes along, until he settles on something that fits him or his lifestyle. His own developement is wrapped up in this, and ideally he reaches his potential through this venture. When he becomes bored with one thing...he moves on. (This puts  boredom in a more positive light, also.)

---Competition can seem to be a very healthy thing to be involved in, but it is, also, left raw and unguarded, enough, to have a downside to fall into. The objective is easily cast aside and one is competing for all the wrong reasons.

---We have said that the positive elements tend to be self-improvement, self-developement, etc., but the negatives are present, too. For instance, stepping all over someone and/or using someone for self-aggrandisement, is not cool. You don't improve if, in the process, you have destroyed another or make the society unliveable for others - by believing one is better than someone else. One is then getting his esteem, by comparing himself with others. When one sees competition in its positive light, NOT falling into getting one's esteem needs met by the process...he has a pretty good recipe.